Looking forward...

Next week we are heading to Kansas to see my family.  I can't tell you how excited I am to go home! :)  I always look forward to this time.  It gives me a calming sense of peace as I see the water tower and make the turn onto Haven/Buhler Road.  It's like suddenly - everything is "OK"....life is not hard anymore.  

It's always a hard time for Jon and I.  I go through this incredible roller coaster of emotions.  I always start dreaming of moving back and living near my family.  I start searching for IT jobs - and brainstorming how we can make it work...making contacts with several people who can "hook us up" with work.  Even though I know this is where God has us now - it is still so hard to live far away.  I dream of going on walks with my mom, shopping with my sister, coffee with my brother, and lunches with my grandparents.  I have 2 of the closest friends ever that still live there - and still to this day - no one can make me laugh like those 2! :)  

It has nothing to do with hating where we are at - we love it here....but it has everything to do with the overwhelming sense of sadness as we pull away, knowing we won't see them for many months.  I always tell myself not to cry...and then the lump comes.  It's so big I can't swallow - and tears pour like rain.  I'm already trying to prepare myself for this bitter sweet visit.  (I'm sure Jon is too!)  :)  

Can't wait to see you guys!  

Helping me mother

Kennedy is into helping with EVERYTHING.  She loves to tell Jaxen "no-no" - and to be a Good boy and OBEY...ha!  At least we are getting through to her right?!  

Well - I am constantly saying - "Let me be the mommy"....

so today - Jaxen was hitting his toy on the TV...and Kennedy said "HURRY MOM...Hit his hand!"...

HA!  Perhaps we need to have a clarification between hitting and spanking....  :)

"Ted"

Lately we've been praying that we would have eyes like Jesus. That we would be able to see people for WHO they are...not how they are dressed - or how they act - or what they do....but for the creatures that God created them to be. This has given us an ENTIRE new outlook on people...it's been an insane ride. 
It's so easy as humans to make friends that are so much LIKE us - everyone wants to be a part of the "in" crowd - and be invited to things - and feel accepted....but that doesn't always happen! The problem with this is that Jesus didn't model that for us in any way, shape or form. Instead of staying close to his disciples and being surrounded by them 24/7 - He would break away from them and go out to meet others. The disciples would have never reached out to the ones that Jesus did...and in fact questioned Him on several occasions! THIS is the model that we are supposed to follow! Christ didn't see these people as sinners - or poor - or the ones who weren't dressed properly...he didn't look to be friends with the guy who was the funny one - or the girl who had all the talent. Instead he found the individuals whom no one else would befriend - and loved on them. This is the mindset that Jon and I are TRYING to adopt. In and through that goal - we have been able to find friendships in the strangest places! People who we would have never dreamed we would befriend - or people that are easily over looked. In return - we've been sooo blessed by meeting some of the neatest people and developing relationships that are growing! 

Today - Jon came home from work and told me that he took time out today to talk to this guy at work. He's kind of the "dork" of the office - and whenever he talks - people usually snicker and roll their eyes. First of all - that breaks my heart in a million pieces. Jon asked him if he had kids today...and the guy proceeded to tell him that he had 2 boys about 16 months apart. Immediately Jon could relate to him b/c of how close in age our kids are. (You have no idea how many relationships this has helped us find common ground in) Jon was telling him that our kids are at the age where they are so needy and they've started "fighting" (which we won't allow) over toys and things. 
"Ted" told Jon that he didn't have to worry about fighting with his 2 kids. Jon was a little excited by this and was hoping the guy would say that "In a year - they'd be best friends". Instead this guy (who has been ignored by ALL in the office) proceeded to tell Jon that his son had almost drowned a year ago. He went on to say that his son was unable to take care of himself in any way. He's unable to even move his head or raise his eyebrow. This guy - (who has been ignored by ALL in the office) has been carrying around this heavy burden. It has just been a year ago that this happened. See - this guy just moved his family here from Oklahoma, has no friends, just started a new job, and leaves his wife every day with one special needs child and one "normal-functioning" child - to fight traffic and sit behind a desk...only to be laughed at and made fun of. Gosh - I don't know about you - but I can't stand the thought. My eyes fill up with tears and my heart breaks for this man. 
All it took was Jon taking his eyes off of himself and his problems - and his every day stress - and taking time to listen to this guy. Jon was able to stop what He was doing - stop trying to get ahead - and just STOP and listen. He was able to share some scripture with him - and did so without being apologetic. "Ted" was completely moved by these actions...and perhaps - if only for today - he can go home FULL...and be able to serve his wife and kids - even if only for today. 
I hope that we ALL take these precious opportunities....I hope that God puts people in your path that you can just stop and listen too....that you can take time to get to know....that you can GET OUT of your comfort zone and be a little uncomfortable with! It makes me shudder to think about how many opportunities I've missed out on...just because I was too busy and too selfish to notice.

Jaxen's 1!

Looking back a year ago today...was a very different time!  First of all...I had just had a c-section...and was recovering in the Hospital.  Secondly - I had a beautiful baby boy named JAXEN! :)  Crazy!  Also on this day - the CELTICS were winning the championship (GO PAUL PIERCE) .   (Sorry Jon)

I can't believe Jaxen is 1 already.  With your first child - it seems like the longest year of your life!  You are pushing them to hold their bottles - then trying to get them to crawl and then pushing them to walk....but with your second...it's completely different!  Suddenly time can't slow down - and life starts flying by without you feeling it!  

Also this day a year ago...our house had been sitting on the market for 5 months.  We KNEW we were moving - but didn't know when or how...and we were VERY unsettled in our current state of life.  Funny part is - that on this day at about 4pm - we got a call from our realtor that our house had gone under contract!....We KNEW God had just the right timing - and we called for a 45 day closing - which would allow us to move by August 1st.  

We had so many unanswered questions - the hows and why's were HUGE and the not knowing KILLED ME!  I remember calling my mom and Danielle - and crying to them about how this was NOT fair....how could a man (Jon's boss) play with our lives!?  What were we supposed to be doing - and how was it going to happen!?  Where would the money for the move come - and how could we afford our car - etc.  So many questions - no answers.  

I am thankful - looking back - for the time we went through.  It made us stronger - we knew we were on the same team.  Suddenly - we didn't need anyone else - it was just about us and the good of our family.  It was an amazing time of growth.  We are thankful for giving us 2 healthy kids...they bring us so much Joy.  (As I'm writing this - they are BOTH screaming their heads off and crying)...so I keep telling myself that they bring us mostly joy.  :)  

I know we have many more memories to make and fun to have as they grow.  We are also so thankful that God moved us to Charlotte.  What an incredible feeling to be right smack dab in God's will for us!  We feel like we were brought here to be a part of Crosspoint (which I've said over and over) - but each new day and new story and new life changed reminds us of that.  

It's been a great year!  HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAXEN....and many many more!